Wishing you a happy, safe and beautiful holiday season. XOXO
And, as an early "present", a parody of a query letter. I don't recommend this, but maybe it would strike the right agent on the right day. It helps to enjoy the humour of a situation, right?
(To the tune of The Beatles "Paperback Writer")
Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book?
It took me years to write, will you take a look?
It's a funny book about a funny girl
And I need a job so I want to be a published writer
Published writer
It's a Hollywood story of a Midwest girl
And she's just been thrown in a brand new world
Her dashing boyfriend's technically her boss
It's a risky move, but she wants to be a horror screenwriter
Horror screenwriter
There's an absent dad and a friend or two
As for conflicts, there's more than a few
Maggie's new at this, but she's got great style
Some pretty cute shoes, and she wants to be a horror screenwriter
Horror screenwriter
I really hope you will enjoy my tale
I'm truly quite desperate to make a sale
The rent is due and my job won't pay
So I need a break and I want to be a published writer
Published writer
Friday, December 18, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Maggie's Shoes
In my book "Becoming Magdalene" there is a scene where the heroine, Maggie, and her friend Tatiana go to an outlet mall in Southern California in search of the perfect outfits to wear to the wrap party for the film they both worked on. I had never been to that particular mall when I wrote that scene, but I did my research and found a great pair of shoes for Maggie.
Or so I thought.
My boyfriend and I actually went to that mall on Saturday. I'm not sure who was dumber: him for suggesting that we go to an outlet mall the weekend after Thanksgiving or me for agreeing to it. Regardless, we had a great time and I found the perfect pair of shoes for Maggie.
Behold, Christian Dior Cruise 09:
Or so I thought.
My boyfriend and I actually went to that mall on Saturday. I'm not sure who was dumber: him for suggesting that we go to an outlet mall the weekend after Thanksgiving or me for agreeing to it. Regardless, we had a great time and I found the perfect pair of shoes for Maggie.
Behold, Christian Dior Cruise 09:
I knew, as soon as I saw these, that Ms. Maggie Vega would go CRAZY for them. Sure, the price tag was a little steep at $975.00, but I want my characters to have whatever their little hearts desire.
A girl can dream, can't she?
Friday, November 20, 2009
Could I Create a Time Warp?
Full confession time: although I am a HUGE fan of scary movies (trust. I am total "genre girl"), I have never seen EVENT HORIZON. I know that it's supposed to be really good, but I have a good reason that it never made it to my viewing list.
The setting: Winter of [date redacted]. I am on a first date with a boy I have a huge crush on. We're in the movie theatre, watching EVENT HORIZON. Only, I'm not really paying attention. It's dark and we're sitting RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER. He goes to hold my hand....I'm so nervous! Does he want to kiss me? I think he wants to kiss me. Maybe he'll kiss me. Wait, what is this movie about?
It doesn't matter, because the theatre has technical difficulties and we never see the end.
The relationship doesn't last, but I forever associate that movie with that boy and that date.
Flash forward to the present day: my boyfriend is shocked that a horror buff like me has never seen EVENT HORIZON. He insists that I put it on my Netflix queue. I do, it arrives and I go to watch it.
It doesn't work.
It won't play on either of the Blue Ray players that we have. It keeps skipping and bouncing and pixelating.
My current theory is that I'm just not supposed to see this movie. That if I watch it, I will create some sort of rip in the space-time continuum and it will create chaos for us all. Should I even order a replacement disc or will doing so force us all to come face to face with our future selves (a la STAR TREK) and create an alternate universe?!
Or, will I just get a disc that actually works? Only time will tell.
The setting: Winter of [date redacted]. I am on a first date with a boy I have a huge crush on. We're in the movie theatre, watching EVENT HORIZON. Only, I'm not really paying attention. It's dark and we're sitting RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER. He goes to hold my hand....I'm so nervous! Does he want to kiss me? I think he wants to kiss me. Maybe he'll kiss me. Wait, what is this movie about?
It doesn't matter, because the theatre has technical difficulties and we never see the end.
The relationship doesn't last, but I forever associate that movie with that boy and that date.
Flash forward to the present day: my boyfriend is shocked that a horror buff like me has never seen EVENT HORIZON. He insists that I put it on my Netflix queue. I do, it arrives and I go to watch it.
It doesn't work.
It won't play on either of the Blue Ray players that we have. It keeps skipping and bouncing and pixelating.
My current theory is that I'm just not supposed to see this movie. That if I watch it, I will create some sort of rip in the space-time continuum and it will create chaos for us all. Should I even order a replacement disc or will doing so force us all to come face to face with our future selves (a la STAR TREK) and create an alternate universe?!
Or, will I just get a disc that actually works? Only time will tell.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
I'm baaaaaack!
I'll bet you thought that I'd forgotten you. Mea culpa. My absence was far too long to be forgivable. In my defense, I've had a lot of irons in the fire and I'm only now starting to get back into the swing of things.
Happy NaNo one and all! I'm participating this time around. Maggie Vega and Nick Cooper are getting their final touch up before the query letters go off to the agents. Gulp. I have a healthy fear of agents, despite the fact (or perhaps due to?) the fact that I work in the industry and my boyfriend works for them.
My current NaNo project is tentatively titled "How to Not Be a Movie Star in Seven Easy Steps." I either really love the title or really hate it. I'm undecided. Thoughts? The story is about gossip blogger Lola Reyes who gets a little more than she bargained for when she writes a story about over-exposed movie star Jack Reynolds and he shows up on her doorstep. Between teaching Jack to be a regular guy, calming down her bridezilla best friend Stephanie and figuring out what the heck is up with her long term boyfriend Adam, Lola's life just went from domestic to insane.
How's that? Yeah, I totally used to work in marketing. I still think in blurb.
Off to NaNo. Cheers!
Happy NaNo one and all! I'm participating this time around. Maggie Vega and Nick Cooper are getting their final touch up before the query letters go off to the agents. Gulp. I have a healthy fear of agents, despite the fact (or perhaps due to?) the fact that I work in the industry and my boyfriend works for them.
My current NaNo project is tentatively titled "How to Not Be a Movie Star in Seven Easy Steps." I either really love the title or really hate it. I'm undecided. Thoughts? The story is about gossip blogger Lola Reyes who gets a little more than she bargained for when she writes a story about over-exposed movie star Jack Reynolds and he shows up on her doorstep. Between teaching Jack to be a regular guy, calming down her bridezilla best friend Stephanie and figuring out what the heck is up with her long term boyfriend Adam, Lola's life just went from domestic to insane.
How's that? Yeah, I totally used to work in marketing. I still think in blurb.
Off to NaNo. Cheers!
Sunday, June 15, 2008
In Defense of LA
Admit it: your probably think it's kind of cool to hate on LA. It's smoggy, right? And full of women with fake breasts and even faker personalities? And everybody is aspiring to be the next Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie. They spend all day at the beach and all night partying, right?
Yeah, not so much.
Excuse me if this is not, in fact, your perception of Los Angeles. Feel free to go check out another blog during this rant. I've recommended a few on the right side of this page.
However, if you do think that LA is one sinner short of Soddam and Gommorah, please hang around.
I hear people LA bash all the time. Even people that live here! The have the aforementioned complaints as well as complaining about the weather. Apparantley, it's boring.
Look, I admit that I'm a transplant, so maybe Los Angeles holds some sort of glamour appeal for me. However, in my time here, I've learned some things. Los Angeles is a very hard city to make it in. It's expensive, it's crowded and there are dozens of people just like you, all waiting for opportunity to knock. People here work hard, because they have to. They work long hours at thankless jobs to try and acheive their goals. They spend hours in their cars and hundreds on gas. They are always "on" because you never know who you are going to meet. They do not suffer fools lightly.
Sure, there is a certain SoCal stereotype that applies. A lot of women are blonde. People diet a lot and eat more organic foods. The three most spoken languages are English, Spanish and Industry.
But, hey, don't knock it until you've tried it. Everyone's life isn't 90210, but we're all trying to live the dream.
Yeah, not so much.
Excuse me if this is not, in fact, your perception of Los Angeles. Feel free to go check out another blog during this rant. I've recommended a few on the right side of this page.
However, if you do think that LA is one sinner short of Soddam and Gommorah, please hang around.
I hear people LA bash all the time. Even people that live here! The have the aforementioned complaints as well as complaining about the weather. Apparantley, it's boring.
Look, I admit that I'm a transplant, so maybe Los Angeles holds some sort of glamour appeal for me. However, in my time here, I've learned some things. Los Angeles is a very hard city to make it in. It's expensive, it's crowded and there are dozens of people just like you, all waiting for opportunity to knock. People here work hard, because they have to. They work long hours at thankless jobs to try and acheive their goals. They spend hours in their cars and hundreds on gas. They are always "on" because you never know who you are going to meet. They do not suffer fools lightly.
Sure, there is a certain SoCal stereotype that applies. A lot of women are blonde. People diet a lot and eat more organic foods. The three most spoken languages are English, Spanish and Industry.
But, hey, don't knock it until you've tried it. Everyone's life isn't 90210, but we're all trying to live the dream.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Advice to Aspiring (Screen)Writers
Dear People Who Send Scripts to the Company I Work For:
Hi. Thanks so much for taking the time to send out your script. That takes guts, and I appreciate it. However, may I offer you some tips? Thanks.
I know that Final Draft does not provide a grammar check. A screenwriter friend of mine explained to me that it is because dialogue does not need to be gramatically correct, especially if it is in a certain dialect. I get that. I really do. As a writer who often slips Spanish slang into her work, I understand that spell check is not always your friend.
HOWEVER! you are sending out your script in a professional capacity. You would like to see it produced. You are sending it to very busy people who receive a bevy of scripts each day and do not suffer fools lightly. Thus, my advice:
"You're" means "You Are". It is NOT interchangable with "your".
"It's" means "It Is". It does NOT mean the same thing as "Its". Just because you want to use a posessive tense does not mean that an apostrophe is necessary.
"Get's". I see this often. I'm not sure what it means. However, I do know that the sentence "John get's the wallet from Mary" makes no sense.
Your character has probably not just "kilt" someone. "Killed" perhaps. However, if they are dressed in Scottish garb, please accept my apologies.
Not everyone reading your work is a "Sir". Please address your querey letter appropriately.
That's it for now. Good luck, aspiring writers! I truly do enjoy reading your work and I'm always looking for that diamond in the rough.
Happy Writing.
Hi. Thanks so much for taking the time to send out your script. That takes guts, and I appreciate it. However, may I offer you some tips? Thanks.
I know that Final Draft does not provide a grammar check. A screenwriter friend of mine explained to me that it is because dialogue does not need to be gramatically correct, especially if it is in a certain dialect. I get that. I really do. As a writer who often slips Spanish slang into her work, I understand that spell check is not always your friend.
HOWEVER! you are sending out your script in a professional capacity. You would like to see it produced. You are sending it to very busy people who receive a bevy of scripts each day and do not suffer fools lightly. Thus, my advice:
"You're" means "You Are". It is NOT interchangable with "your".
"It's" means "It Is". It does NOT mean the same thing as "Its". Just because you want to use a posessive tense does not mean that an apostrophe is necessary.
"Get's". I see this often. I'm not sure what it means. However, I do know that the sentence "John get's the wallet from Mary" makes no sense.
Your character has probably not just "kilt" someone. "Killed" perhaps. However, if they are dressed in Scottish garb, please accept my apologies.
Not everyone reading your work is a "Sir". Please address your querey letter appropriately.
That's it for now. Good luck, aspiring writers! I truly do enjoy reading your work and I'm always looking for that diamond in the rough.
Happy Writing.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
International Travel
I am an international traveler. Sort of. Okay, I've technically been to Mexico. But, I did get my passport and I hope to use it soon.
However, in between running errands, chatting up neighbors and fighting Los Angeles traffic, I did manage to go to Persia today. And I was in Japan last week. How? Books. They can take you to exotic places and teach you about new customs.
"Yes," I'm sure you're saying. "Yes, I know this." And I'm sure you do. But, itsn't it amazing? And wonderful?
Take the book I'm currently reading. "A Veil of Roses" by Laura Fitzgerald (no relation). It's about a young Persian woman who comes to the United States to escape from an opressive regime and find a husband. Except she isn't really sure that she wants one. Until I started this story I knew virtually nothing of Iran other than what I've seen on the news and we all know that isn't always pleasant. However, this story has opened my eyes to other traditions and ideas and the beauty of the Persian culture.
So, dear reader, where would you like to go? It's easy enough to get there. Just read.
However, in between running errands, chatting up neighbors and fighting Los Angeles traffic, I did manage to go to Persia today. And I was in Japan last week. How? Books. They can take you to exotic places and teach you about new customs.
"Yes," I'm sure you're saying. "Yes, I know this." And I'm sure you do. But, itsn't it amazing? And wonderful?
Take the book I'm currently reading. "A Veil of Roses" by Laura Fitzgerald (no relation). It's about a young Persian woman who comes to the United States to escape from an opressive regime and find a husband. Except she isn't really sure that she wants one. Until I started this story I knew virtually nothing of Iran other than what I've seen on the news and we all know that isn't always pleasant. However, this story has opened my eyes to other traditions and ideas and the beauty of the Persian culture.
So, dear reader, where would you like to go? It's easy enough to get there. Just read.
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